Boy, have we come a long way, baby -- from our puritan ancestors to today's "leave nothing to the imagination" MTV. What's normal? What's abnormal? How do you explain S-E-X to your children without being embarrassed?

There's more to sex education than just giving information. There's a conveyance of values, standards and attitudes that have been passed down for generations. This is where the immortal words of your mother hit home with renewed meaning -- "Actions speak louder than words."

This passing of information to the next generation is a life-long process. If you wait until the "right" moment to sit down and fill your children in, you might find it's too late.

Startling statistics

Teens pass around many myths about sex, as well as ineffective folk remedies for preventing pregnancy. A quick look at a few statistics shows the need for better sex education. Teen-age birth rates have risen rapidly in America. Eight out of 10 teen pregnancies are unintended.

Needless to say, your children could be headed for trouble unless you set them straight. What they don't know can hurt them. And today, with the prevalence of infectious diseases such as AIDS and hepatitis, ignorance can even kill.

Having the talk

It's hard to picture our children as sexual beings, but it's probably harder for them to see US as sexual beings. Feeling uncomfortable talking to our children about sex is OK -- as long as we go ahead and discuss the subject anyway. Eventually, the discomfort will go away. What will not go away is your teen's developing sexuality.

Teens are naturally curious about the changes going on in their bodies. Girls want to know about menstruation and pregnancy. They are often concerned about how fast their hips and breasts are growing. Boys are curious about the growth of the penis and testes and want to know what causes erections and wet dreams. Both sexes need to know about pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases and the normalcy of masturbation.

Sex education is a gift your child can keep on giving. So here are some tips to help you get started:

• Start talking about sex and sexuality when your children are very young.
• Talk about sex on your child's level. The "whole story" isn't needed all at once.
• Misinformation is easier to combat before it's heard. Ignorance, not knowledge, contributes to most inappropriate sexual behavior.
• Sexual feelings and urges are normal. They don't have to be acted on. Abstinence is an option ANY time.
• A strong sense of self-worth can help your teen resist peer pressure to have sex before he or she is ready.
• In addition to facts, give your child healthy attitudes and values. Sexuality, at its best, is a beautiful, wonderful gift from God.
• There are no dumb questions.
• The passage from adolescence to adulthood is subtle, inconsistent and not related to a certain age.

Remember your teen may feel a lot of pressure to experiment with sex. Boys, in particular, can make sexually inexperienced friends feel out of place. Girls may think they have to compete with prettier or more popular friends by losing their virginity. Discussing sex with your teen in an honest and caring way can help provide the support your son or daughter needs to take a strong stand.